Oh, Emotions!!

These last several days have been an emotional roller coaster! Some may or may not know that we found out that we were pregnant the beginning of December, everything seemed to be going well, blood work was fine, first check-up was fine but at 10 weeks (Friday, January 6th) I started having very minimal complications that got me another visit to the doctor the same day. He listened for the heartbeat but said at 10 weeks it is unlikely that we would hear it without having an ultrasound. Everything else looked good to him but to be sure he wanted to do an US, it was at the end of the day so the US Tech was gone so he did it himself. Unfortunately, he had bad news for us, the baby seemed to have stopped developing about 4 weeks ago. My body has continued on thinking I'm pregnant but it was not a viable pregnancy. We went back in on Monday morning, January 9th for a follow-up US just to be sure and got the same terrible information! I went in this morning to have a DNC so now we are all on the mend mentally and emotionally while I am also healing physically. This has been really hard on me knowing now what we've lost, I was so looking forward to A being a big bro and I think he would have been awesome but I also need to remember that we have a super healthy toddler (aka monster) already and I'm sure we can have the same again soon enough! I also need to remind myself that nature was doing what was best, and that there is a reason that baby didn't want to keep developing.

I had been contemplating posting this blog but reminded myself that this blog is for me and also for others to realize that miscarriages do happen and it seems far too often. I want to make myself even more prepared and healthier for us to try again and hopefully don't have to go through this again!